Gem Art
by Peach Wookiee
Summary: Greg asks Vidalia to paint a picture of him for Rose. This is a comical explanation for Amethyst's infamous comment in "Maximum Capacity." This is my very first Steven Universe fic and a one-shot. Please read and review!


Gem Art

 _Hello, Steven Universe fans! This is my first story about any of the Crystal Gems and the citizens of Beach City. If you're looking for a theory on what happened to Pink Diamond or a glorious battle, this is not your story. If you want something funny, though, you might enjoy this._

 _ **Disclaimer:**_ _I don't own Steven, the show or anything else in the Steven Universe…universe. They belong to the brilliant Rebecca Sugar and Cartoon Network._

 _ **Author's note: I wish to thank the amazing Vampiric Dragonrider for being my beta!**_

Golden rays fell upon Vidalia's current painting model as he stood poised with one foot on top of a stool. She hadn't painted much since Sour Cream was born, but on this day, she was doing an old friend a favor. His brown hair cascaded over his shoulders, all the way down to his feet. She'd have loved to paint this outside, but was pretty sure the Beach City police force would not look kindly upon a naked man on the beach.

"Vidalia, are you sure about this?" Greg Universe asked, keeping his pose as she sketched him out. "I mean, do you… really need me naked for this?" The deep pink upon his cheeks was gradually making its way to his chest and… below.

"Greg, I need to be accurate. Why are you so nervous?" Vidalia's lips quirked upward. He was still pretty hot, she admitted to herself. "You want something special for Rose, right?"

"Yeah, it's just… well…" The blush had spread all over by now. "I mean," he stammered, "what if someone other than Rose sees this? What if she hates this? What if…?"

Vidalia frowned now as she finished the sketch. "Greg, relax. If someone other than Rose sees it, it's because you've probably become famous or she thought it was so awesome, she wanted people to see it. And if you're worried someone's going to walk in and see this, don't. I don't have anyone coming today."

"Well, okay." Greg's color returned to normal and he stood confidently again. "How long will this take?"

She looked away to consider her myriad paints and began mixing colors. "A couple of hours, I think, to make sure I've got the colors right." Her lips quirked up again. "I have to admit, I was surprised to see that birthmark."

His face pinked up again, but this time, he was giggling. Vidalia joined in. And then, a _third_ giggler chimed in. "Greg, what are you doing, man? Vidalia, why is he here in your studio?" Amethyst asked, her giggle calming down. The short-haired lavender Gem moved close to Greg with the curiosity of an excited puppy.

"I told Vidalia I'd babysit Sour Cream again and she offered to paint a picture of me for Rose. Don't tell her that I'm doing that, all right?"

"Okay, but… Greg, you're not wearing your clothes." A pair of dark indigo eyes widened. "Music man, are you naked?" His intake of breath and Vidalia's snicker confirmed the answer to that question. "Wow, I've never seen a male human naked before. So what's this thing between your legs and what does it do?" Blushing furiously, he explained as Vidalia snickered.

When Greg finished, Amethyst reached out toward what made him male, but he cupped his hands over that part of his anatomy. "You… you can look but don't touch, okay?" She moved her hand back. "Remember if you hurt it, I can't grow it back!" he yelped.

"Okay, okay, but… can I stay and watch? I promise I won't tell Rose, Garnet _or_ Pearl what you're doing!" She held her hands up and smoothly moved to a pillow next to Vidalia and sat down.

Greg frowned thoughtfully and smiled. "Okay. I guess it wouldn't hurt."

SU

About two hours later, Vidalia stood and moved back to view her work. Greg had gone off to get his clothes back on, and Amethyst grinned at the painting. "Good work, Vidalia. You made him totally look super hot again! And Rose is gonna love this!"

"You really think so? I didn't go too far?"

"Nah," the Gem answered, the grin still plastered on her lavender face. "And I can't ever tell Rose what I saw!"

Vidalia considered that for a moment and went just a bit pale. "Oh man… she won't get mad at me for this, will she?"

"Nah, she's too nice for that! If we'd hurt Greg, that'd be something else."

SU

Two days later, Greg strode down the street toward the Crystal Temple, a large brown parcel in his arms. He stopped at the storage unit where he kept his things. "I'm going to need to clear some stuff out of here at some point," he muttered to himself as he opened the unit and stepped in.

A familiar shadow fell over his own, and sure enough… "Whoa, Greg, you've got lots of stuff in here! Has Pearl seen this?!" Amethyst asked. "Probably not, 'cause it'd be clean by now!"

Greg grinned and shook his head. "Nope, though Rose has."

"Wow, so she's seen your junk too?"

Greg's face was beet red as he turned around. "My what?!"

"Your junk, all this stuff!" she said, waving her hand around and an innocent expression on her face. "Why? What'd you think I meant?"

 _Do I really have to explain double entendres to her?_ he wondered. She seemed to know, but he could never be sure. "Uh, never mind. But Rose has seen this. So yeah, you've seen my junk."

A snort suddenly made him question what he'd just said. "Whatever you say, music man…"

THE END


End file.
